Thursday, November 17, 2011


I’m getting my catheter removed so around 7am Friday morning, I’ll no longer be a human bagpipe. Needless to say, I am psyched. Having kidney disease sucks but I hated having a tube run out of my body. It made me feel like a frickin’ droid and not in the cool way.
As I was leaving the hospital for my Pre-Op, I ran into this lady who was the spitting image of the mother from the Walking Dead who has the missing kid. She had short cropped, blonde hair and I could tell at one point she was a looker but sickness has aged her. She was walking very slowly like each step was painful and I noticed her angles were swollen with edema. She brought a lit cigarette to her lips as we passed.
She said to me with a sad smile and low voice, “Good to know that I am not alone,” as I hobbled by her.
Spitting image, just needs a cigarette.

My heart was hurting for her because I know how she feels but I couldn’t relate to her at that moment. Truth be known, it kind of pissed me off. I feel good. I feel real good almost like I used. I don’t walk very well anymore but I have boatloads of energy compared to Robby 2 years ago. I am not in pain anymore. I don’t feel sick all the time or weak. I am also happy.
Thanksgiving is a week away. I am very excited because I am spending it with my new family and my old family. I am thankful to have these people in my life and I hope they know I am proud to be in theirs.
I am sure at the dinner table on Thursday; we’ll go around and share what we’re thankful for. I know that I am going to say something about having my Mom and Kim and the kids at my table and I am going to mean every word. Deep down, I have already given thanks that I do not feel one little bit like that lady I passed yesterday. I apologize for my selfishness but it’s a good feeling to wake up and realize that I am going to make it through the day without being exhausted or hurting or depressed. I guess being thankful just doesn’t cover thinking of other people and appreciating them but also being a bit selfish from time to time.

Sorry being so serious. I just needed to get this off my chest. It has been haunting me since yesterday. I originally planned a Thanksgiving sort of blog because of a picture I found. Over the next week, I am going to try get a few fun T-day stories in but I love this picture. It is cracking me up and is over on the Star Wars blog. If you get a chance, read the T-day Holiday special idea pitched to them regarding Wookies and  a Turkey based Jedi. Priceless.

1 comment:

  1. Dearest, I have stop much gratitude that you are feeling better, and yes, there its a place for selfishness now and again. Thank you for the update.
    In Joy,